Aundes Aura: Part Two

Here is where we finished off last time:

Two days later, the Duthonians attack. Eoin goes down into Emareus Village to fight, but is knocked out. When he awakes, he is in the back of a locked cart with Faine, who had been taken from the dungeon. There is no sign of Saera or Echo.

Eoin and Faine are thrown into a dungeon. Eoin discovers that Faine knows these people. In fact, that he used to be involved with the group. They are the Order, sworn to protect the land of Válkia in the name of the Gods. Their spies had been tracking Eoin, Saera and Faine. Eoin discovers that the Order has taken Saera to Arlea, the island country to the west, and are on their way to a particular volcano, at which a ritual called the Cleansing must be performed in order to release the Aura from the world, and thus return balance. But the only way to complete the Cleansing is to stab Saera in the heart with a ritual blade drenched in holy blood.
Echo, who also used to be one of the Order, shows up and frees Eoin and Faine from the dungeon. They ride back to Emareus, and then travel to Ortuaire on the western coast.
Briefly, we switch to Saera's point of view, and discover how she is being treated. Back to Eoin, Faine and Echo, they arrive in the port town of Mengerikaan, having crossed the small stretch of sea. When they reach Saera she is tied to a tree, a man's dripping blade raised and prepared to strike. Faine lets and arrow loose and pierces the man's hand before he can complete the ritual.
They escape with Saera back into Meira. In a forest along the way, they encounter a group of enigmatic men wearing cloaks. They decide it would be unwise to alert the men of their presence and sneak away. They come across one of them astray from the group. He speaks to them with a hissing voice, and then from his hands he wills a stream of fire towards them. Saera blinds him with her light and they run. Once they escape the forest they can see smoke over the trees where they had been set alight by the man in his fury.
Who are these people? Echo explains that they are Naeveri, creatures sent from the Fires Below to solve the imbalance in the world caused by Saera having Aundes Aura, while someone else, somewhere, has another piece of it. Only one person must have an Aura at any given time.

They are told in the next village that Tarne, Eoin and Saera's home village, has been destroyed. The Naeveri spawn from volcanoes, and Tarne sits near Mount Vaenor. At the time the ritual was not completed, all the volcanoes in Vàlkia erupted, and Tarne was destroyed.

The group continue to Emareus, and the Queen has been preparing an attack on the Naeveri base. They tell her it is an impossible battle, that they are too powerful. The Order arrives and requests a teaming up with the Queen.

The Queen sends an escort of one hundred soldiers, including Faine and Echo, to accompany seven High Priests of the Order. They will go to the main volcano from which the Naeveri spawn, and recite a prayer which will send them back to the Fires. At that point, though, a great, fiery demon appears and largely decimates the escort and a number of the priests before they can flee. Echo is injured.

They return to the Queen with news that the attack was unsuccessful. She doesn't know what to do now. The Duthonians are well on their way. The Naeveri are still on the loose. But she must protect the Descendent of Light.


The next day the Duthonians attack. The Meiraan army meet them in battle. It begins. As they fight, an army of Naeveri arrive, coming over a hill. Fiery hell ensues.

What happens next? That would be telling.

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Aundes Aura: Part One

Aundes Aura is a tale of the lengths people will go to for those they love. Much of the background is based on the concept of the Gods. The Gods are:

Elcalades the Giving, Father of the Gods

Aundes the Shining, Goddess of Light

Kathes the True, Goddess of Nature

Taemus the Blissful, God of Dreams

Careus the Convictor, God of Time

Endures the Great, God of War

Maechre the Escort, God of the Passing

All the Gods sent down their Gifts into the world, that Humanity may use them to solve its problems. But once upon a time, a war broke out as Humanity was using the Gifts to its own ends. That war has since ended, but it lives on in people's hearts.

The Church of Duthonne teaches that Aundes, the Goddess of Light, is evil, because she blinded Humanity, and caused the Great War of the Gods. This is in fact just an excuse created by the Church, a false "reason" for their dislike towards her.

Southern country: Duthonne – Capital: Parthon

Northern country: Meira – Capital: Emareus

Island: Arlea

The Abominations from the Fires Below:

Naeveri (coming from the Albanian word for abomination, “neveri”) are “abominations” sent from the Fires to solve the imbalance in the world. They look like humans, but have red slits for eyes, always wear black, hooded robes and throw fire. Singular form: Naevera.

Their soul intention is to solve the problem of the imbalance by killing either Saera or Eoin. The world is imbalanced because both of them have a fraction of Aundes Aura inside them (although Eoin doesn't know it), while Aundes Aura itself is meant to be a complete element.

Pronunciation: nay-vear-uh (vear rhymes with fear)

nay-vear-ie (vear-ie rhymes with query)

Plot Synopsis

When Eoin's sister Saera absorbs the Aura of a goddess considered evil, her life is instantly threatened. Seven years later, the Aura shows signs of resurfacing. Someone discovers her dark secret, and their only option then is to escape their home town before word spreads. On the travelling carts, they meet the traveller named Faine, who appears learnèd in many travelling arts, as well as in combat.

They arrive at the capital city, and Faine will be competing in the Grand Arena Tournament. Eoin and Saera go along to cheer for him. But during Faine's match, a great burst of light suddenly stuns the Arena, and all turn to look at Saera. Now all know of her secret, and they close in. Faine climbs up into the stands to help Eoin protect his sister. Encountering a score of guards along the way, Eoin, Saera and Faine make it to the stables and ride out from the city, heading for the town closest to the Duthonne-Meira border: Tierra.

This town is not what they expect, though. It has recently been under attack, and is in the process of rebuilding. They discover that the town had an attack ordered against it by the Church because it had been trading with a nearby town in Meira, across the border. This is because the Church consider it a sin to deal with non-believers, and especially those who believe the evil gods are the good.

Faine tells Eoin and Saera that the quickest way to get into Meira is by taking a passage underneath the White Ranges. But it isn't necessarily the easiest. Still, Saera's life is under threat, so they decide to take the plunge.

They emerge on the other side of the White Ranges, and after walking for perhaps half an hour they reach the small town of Efisae. Here Faine introduces them to Echo. Efisae is attacked, and Eoin, Saera, Faine and Echo go down and help drive the Duthonians back out of the town and out of the country.

The group travel to Colette, a village that sits in the middle of a forest, and then up to the capital city of Meira, Emareus. In this country, Aundes is a revered goddess. So when they ask the Queen to help protect Saera from the Duthonians, she promptly agrees. She is not so quick, however, to accept Faine. For reasons unknown to Eoin and Saera, the Queen locks Faine in the dungeon.

Two days later, the Duthonians attack. Eoin goes down into the village to fight, but is knocked out. When he awakes, he is in the back of a locked cart with Faine, who had been taken from the dungeon. There is no sign of Saera or Echo.

The plot synopsis will be continued in part two.

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Novel Progress Update

I have just passed 20,000 words!

My 20,000th word was -- wait for it -- a.

Yes, the first letter of the alphabet is my 20,000th word.

My Life In Writing

Today I am going to tell you all about where my writing of fiction began, where it developed, all the way up to where I am am now.

Grade One:
The first time I ever picked up a felt-tip pen and wrote my first story was sometime in Grade One. At that time I was seven years old (as is common in Australia). My first stories were very short and minimalistic. There were no settings, no plots, only characters and their situations. These stories were based on either experiences I'd had, or experiences I wished to have. My friend and I would collaborate on stories. He used to want to be a train driver, so we would write stories about him being a train driver. I always wanted to have powers, so I would write stories in which I had them.

The first story I wrote which had a unique (albeit shallow) character whose name I didn't take from someone or something I knew was called "The Whole New World". Does that title remind you at all of Aladin? So, this character named Cersty (Kirsty) had powers, and she fought her sister and won. Then she travelled the world fighting many evil people, and eventually she lost. Then she went to heaven, and references were made to Moses, Jesus and Mary. I don't remember if she ended up staying in heaven or going home. It was written nearly ten years ago after all.

Grade Two:
Grade Two was perhaps my proudest year. I wrote a story with a plot in a small notebook called "A Magical World". This was back when I was reading Harry Potter for the first time, and a lot of inspiration came from that. The setting was a castle where witches and wizards were trained. There were three friends: Sam, Peter and Ashley. Firstly I wrote Sam's story, which was three parts. I completed that. Then I wrote Peter's story, and that also had three parts. I completed that. They were each sixteen pages long. I came to Ashley's story, though, and only reached four pages before I stopped writing. The last word I wrote on "A Magical World" was and.

The perfect cliffhanger.

Grade Three:
I wrote nothing as notable in Grade Three, but I continued to devise short stories that were mostly unfinished.

Grade Four:
I began to rewrite "A Magical World". This rewrite was completely fresh. The names were changed to James Pendower, Mitchell Buller and Misty Peppermill. There is no shade or sliver of the plot of the two-year-old original to be found. But it drew countlessly more parallels to Harry Potter. When I say countlessly, I mean there were so many parallels that it is in fact funny. Apart from the talented main character, the not-so-talented male friend and the very talented female friend, the school itself is a blatant Harry Potter reference.

Pigsnouts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

I had some original ideas, though, whether bad or horrible. Like the under-developed Quidditch replacement, which I called Forequest. Students would fly on Unicorns and fight mid-air with swords. Wait! Unicorns don't fly! Also, in Transformation class (Transfiguration) students were taught to merge with their Unicorn to become a Centaur.

Towards the end, for no given reason the Manager (Headmaster) makes the children the Manager's Assistants. They help to take down the evil Logan Cuesty on Mayfair Island (Monopoly). James uses his knowlege of the elements to battle him, but in the end Cuesty gives up. He gives a device to the Manager, saying it will show him where all the evil wizards are. Then Misty spontaneously remembers that it is her birthday tomorrow.

The next day they have a birthday party for Misty and Logan Cuesty is there, laughing with them as though he had been their friend the whole time. I don't think I was going to write much more than that, but it stopped there. I never got to write "The End".

In the whole story I never went into description of the setting, and nor did I write any interior monologue. It was in first person, too. At the time I stopped writing it it was just over ten thousand words.

Grade Five:
Early year five. Eleven years old. I wrote a story in a completely unique world, as in a world that was like Earth, but was not Earth. I called it World War. Here is an excerpt:

I picked up the phone and dialed the number. It felt very odd; there was a strange sensation in the pit of my stomach. The Richelieu was going to fight against the Abonasians. The city of Osmocryland, Richelieu, was going to face the city of Nalyrk, Abonasia, and then venture down to the city of Mothorituar, Richelieu, and then face Fialmu, Abonasia.

I wrote only four pages of that story.

Towards the end of the year my friend suggested a collaboration story involving pirates. I quickly agreed and we began to brainstorm plot ideas.

Grade Six:
During the hoidays before i started Grade Six I worked on the new story, "British Pirate". The thing is, I never did any research. The novel was horribly historically incorrect, with crossovers between pirates and Vikings. This time each chapter was exactly three pages long in a Word document. Still, my characterization improved, and I entered interior monologue a few times. I described the setting more as well, and got an idea for how to set out dialogue.

Year Seven:
During this year I continued to work on "British Pirate".

Year Eight:
I didn't quite get near the end, and stopped writing it at around twenty-two thousand, three-hundred words. For as slow a writer as I was back then, I got pretty far.

Year Nine:
It was possibly towards the end of the school holidays when I came up with the idea for a new story. I think the first thing that came into my head was the title: Until They Unite. In my mind this was the One that finally had a chance at being published, with a plot that was interesting enough for people to keep reading, charcacters that were believable and an actual backstory. A world that was interesting and different from the one we know. I created a language, which was simply a code of switched alphabetic letters, and called it Hewa (mine). Brec ec ha, c'xaypewz Hewa. I really don't like that anymore; it looks horrid. I now prefer just to make the language up, on a basis of Latin. So for different regions I can have something more Italian, or something more Germanic, French or Spanish.

Alas, once more I failed to complete the story. I had it all planned out, but somewhere along the way I lost confidence in myself. I stopped writing Until They Unite at nineteen-thousand, three-hundred words, sometime early 2009.

Year Ten:
This was the beginning of my current work-in-progress. One day in March I had a cold and took the day off from school (which I rarely do). It was incredible. I lay there in bed, my eyes closed as I tried to rest, and an image popped into my head. It was an image of a girl in a cave, standing by a mystical, glowing stalagmite. There was a great flash of light as she touched the stalagmite, and she had now absorbed the light. The fact that she had this light would change her life. She was no longer safe.

I have much to say about Aundes Aura, so you can look forward to that in my next post.

Finally I believe I have a story with enough backstory, enough depth of world, enough depth of character. The characters have their own histories, enough that I could tell the story from a completely different perspective. I have been writing this since September, and already I am past nineteen-thousand words. I am speeding past my other attempts, laughing as I go.

These past ten years have all been leading up to this.

My new daily goal

Just now after much, much pondering and calculating, I have finally decided upon a new daily writing goal for myself. This new goal is absolutely shocking. You would never expect that I would be lowering the count!

My goal used to be 300 words. Then it was lowered to 200 words. I am now lowering it once more to just 160 words.

My reasoning behind this: It is easier to write 160 words than 200, no? My aim for before the year's end is to have reached very near the end of my novel by the 31st of December. This new 160 word aim gives me 4,800 words a month, and in extension I would have more than 75,000 words by the end of the year!

What are your thoughts? Am I thinking too much? Should I have a higher goal?

Fantasy World Building: Hierarchal System

Before deciding what type of hierarchal system your world will have, or how it will function differently from those that already exist, one must research the current hierarchal systems. Below are definintions of some of the hierarchal systems.

Dictatorship: When a person takes control of a country without necessarily having been consented to do so by the public. This government is ruled by either one person or a group of people. In a literary context, examples of dictators include Big Brother in George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four, the Wizard in L. Frank Baum's The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, Jack in William Golding's Lord of the Flies and Napoleon in George Orwell's Animal Farm.

Manorialism: Manorialism was characterised by the power in a lord, supported economically from his own direct landholding and from the obligatory contributions of a legally subject part of the peasant population under his jurisdiction. These obligations could be payable in labor or, on rare occasions, in coin.
Demesne: The part directly controlled by the lord and used for the benefit of his household and dependents.
Serf (dependent) holdings: The peasants here are obliged to supply the lord with specified labour services.
Free peasant land: Without such obligation as the serf  holdings, but otherwise subject to manorial jurisdiction and custom, and owing money rent fixed at the time of the lease.
Theocracy: Theocracy is a form of government in which a god or deity is recognized as the state's supreme civil ruler. It is a form of government in which divine power governs an earthly human state via religious institutional representatives, replacing or dominating civil government. Theocratic governments enact theonomic laws.
The head of state of the Vatican is the pope, elected by the College of Cardinals, an assembly of senior Catholic clerics. A pope is elected for life, and voting is limited to cardinals under 80 years of age. A secretary of state, directly responsible for international relations, is appointed by the pope. The Vatican legal system is subject to the dictates of the pope.

Monarchy: A Monarchy is a form of government in which supreme power is given to an individual who is the head of state, often for life or until abdication. The person who heads a monarchy is called a monarch. It was a common form of government in the world during ancient and medieval times.
Hereditary rule is often a common characteristic, but elective monarchies are also considered monarchies, and some states have hereditary rulers, but are rather considered republics.

Republics: A republic is a form of government in which the head of state is not a monarch, and the people have an impact on its government.
The most common definition of a republic is a state without a monarch. In the United States, Founding Fathers like James Madison defined republic in terms of representative democracy as opposed to only having direct democracy, and this usage is still employed by many viewing themselves as "republicans".

Commonwealth: A traditional English term for a political community founded for the common good or in which all participants have equal standing.
The Commonwealth of Nations (formerly the "British Commonwealth") is a voluntary association of 54 independent sovereign states, most of which are former British colonies, or dependencies of these colonies, plus the United Kingdom itself. The Commonwealth's membership includes both republics and monarchies. The hereditary head of the Commonwealth of Nations is Queen Elizabeth II. She also reigns as monarch directly in a number of states; notably the United Kingdom, Australia, Barbados, Canada, Jamaica, and New Zealand. The Commonwealth of Nations is sometimes referred to as the New Commonwealth in a British context.
There are countless forms of governments, but with some research, you can create your very own, unique hierarchal system. This can be done either by taking aspects from systems you have learned about and melding them together, or by creating your own based on what you now know.

The system I have employed in ''Aundes Aura'' is a fusion of Monarchy and Theocracy, giving and taking different aspects of the government. At the top of the hierarchal ladder is the king or queen, whose own rule is largely dictated by the beliefs of the church. Then come the high priests, who are divinely guided. Next step down are lords or priests who may have ownership of a village, which includes the central market district and the outer farming fields. And finally come the peasants who serve by either working fields or running a store within the market district.

See what you can do with your own governmental hierarchy.

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Welcome to The Dark Corner of the Mind. My name is Ryan Sullivan and my aim with this blog is to help others with their own writing, as well as to make note of some of my own writing endeavours.

Here at The Dark Corner, Real Life is both our best friend and our worst enemy. Look to him for inspiration, but don't let him get in the way too much.

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